[ It's not that she cannot speak with him or share her feelings with him; it's only that there rarely seems like a good time to speak with him, and-- she believes she can wait for him, prioritizing and compartmentalizing until then. They're speaking now, after all, and she doesn't regret the timing, given... everything. ]

It's..

It's familiar. Not defending myself, I mean. No matter what another may feel about me,  it's easiest to continue on.

[ In her homeworld, she rarely, if ever, spoke to others about herself-- even if they had a title for her, a role to play, an idea of her; never had she clarified of what it had meant to be an "Aegis". Not even Addam. Her thoughts about her 'brother', her thoughts about the Architect, all rarely touched upon, if not kept silent entirely.

(Silence was the easy way to go, especially in a world where some of its rulers consider her an 'it'.) ]

But she knows she still does it to this day, not defending herself, not bothering to correct assumptions, not speaking up against labels or projection. A bad habit, and Noctis-- wants better for her, too, but this is something she has to try to work on to be better at. ] I-- always thought it was that, what you said before, a kind tactical retreat.

It seems we both have something to work on.