[He knew that part. She'd not been shy about telling him the same thing, to tell people how he felt before they were gone. He'd failed with Luna, failed with his father back home, probably failed with many other people he'll likely never meet again. Living so long, and living in the world so briefly, in a place this transient, must make for many regrets when it comes to missed opportunities. Any day - every day - could be the last.
Feeling is one thing. But wanting... the words she struggles with, every time...]
Are there things you're not... allowed to want for yourself?
[He doesn't know the rules, but he can understand the limitations. There are plenty of things he might want but aren't allowed to pursue, back home. Growing up, normal things like going to university, studying and finding a career, exploring outside the city, living a life away from the public eye- all of it was out of his reach since the day he was born. Her limits seem so self-imposed, but maybe they're not? This place, her existence, is otherworldly.
She'd asked if they were allowed to be together, on his part. What about hers? He trusts her- wants to trust her- she's not just pushing herself to mend the world they're on, right?]
[ Within this realm, they're merely siting beside each other. She's yet to reach of his hand. In reality, she's already brought his slumbering body to the couch, his head on her lap. She can see both of them, be aware of both that and this at once.
Her expression falls from him, conflicted. ]
I'm not supposed to have this form you see now... to be Mythra or Pyra.
To be anything other than a crystal. To want... Mm. To feel in general.
[ Observing. That had been all she was meant to do. To watch, to record, and to obliterate when the time came. But is that the truth, either? There's something missing, she feels but-- again, not important.
Yes. She isn't supposed to even feel. Despite this, she brings a hand up to her chest as if she's holding something precious, her look sentimental, albeit struggling still. ] But here we are... And I cannot deny these feelings.
[ Saying what she wants still feels like too much. ]
[That... that, finally, is a relief to him. He closes his eyes, head bowed as he mulls over her words. He doesn't need the definitive words to be spoken if she can give the implications, and while it's true that she could just be placating him, sensing his anxiety, what he wants is to chase this reassurance, to believe her and believe everything they've experienced thus far. It felt real. Just because it'd serve two purposes doesn't make it less real. It doesn't make it bad.
His reasons for doing this, for choosing her, are inherently selfish. He knows this, and it's something he's allowed himself after months of doing whatever everyone else told him to do- because he couldn't deny his feelings, either. He can't fault her for thinking of others first as long as the rest still rings true.]
You want me to meet Mythra, [is his response, finally. If she can't say it, he'll say it for her.] You want to use your fire. You want to be with people you care about. ...You... want to be with me.
[He looks meaningfully over at her, more of the tension bleeding from his shoulders, and offers his hand out.]
[ Pyra looks up-- out, towards the imagined horizon of the realm-- but not actually searching for anything beyond. What she has, she has right here, before she ever knew she could ever want for anything. Him, his care, the ability to read her so well, to understand, to accept. How easily he tells her wants when she has such difficulty speaking them, when she feels she cannot. A part of her feels foolish in the face of how effortlessness he makes it sound to speak those desires.
As it were, she wants a lot of things. She wants others to be safe, she wants this world to be saved, she wants his world to know the light, she wants her world to last-- and by the Architect, she wants him to live. She wants to live, too. She wants them to stay together, to have what they have and continue to have it for as long as either of them want it....
One want duels with the other: her existing and the world remaining. She cannot have both, and she has chosen the latter. But she can have this, can't she be stronger for him, to say it? She wants to be stronger for him. Inspiring, brave, she can call him all those things, but she needs to finally be brave, act on that inspiration.
Her vision mists, and she bows her head, drawing a breath. She tears not for sorrow for herself, but this time in gratefulness. How lucky is she, to have someone as understanding as him next to her....
Her hand reaches of his, finding it without looking, and she closes her eyes. ]
[He holds her hand quietly for a few moments, lingering in relaxed silence with those words settling around him like a comforting blanket. One more secret unlocked, one more method of understanding her; if he can find the answer himself, she's able to tell him if it's true or not. If she wants it. That's a place that he can start, a path that he can follow. Maybe he can help her this way.
After the moment passes he gently tugs her hand and pulls her closer, and if she doesn't resist he releases her hand so he can wrap his arms around her instead, holding her against him, that same hand lifting to stroke through her hair. This feels real, too. Not just physically, but he can feel the warmth spreading through him, joy and relief and something softer, fluttering and familiar and yet unnamed. He finds himself smiling, his head resting against hers.]
...If I hug you in a dream, can you feel it in real life?
[ She smiles quietly into the embrace, her arms not hesitating to wrap around him in kind. It carries a gratefulness with it, a thank you for being here, for being him.
He'll feel her head shaking against his shoulder, a soft laugh carried in her voice. ]
No, no... But I do have your head resting in my lap, in reality.
You're very cute when you sleep, you know.
[ Teasing aside, however... she pulls away just enough to look at him. ] Thank you, Noct. For listening.
[C-cute... one of these days he'll catch her sleeping, and then they'll see who's the cute one... nevertheless as they pull apart he's still smiling back at her, softly, and carrying its own sort of gratefulness.]
Thank you for sharing it.
[For sharing this- this place, this other side of her that he can only imagine few have been lucky enough to experience. For giving him an answer, letting him help her push through to it. Her willingness to try means a lot to him.]
[ She's smiling fondly at him when he gives his thanks in return, pulling away further so that she may take his hands in her again. Pyra looks down at their joined grasp, shoulders rising and falling. ]
[Ready... he glances down at their joined hands, lips pursing. Ready for something he has no expectations for, besides a few vague hints and a gender? Here, sitting inside a crystal that feels like a whole other world, sleeping and dreaming things he doesn't know about and would never have known has she not invited him here? It's a bit late to back out now, even if he wasn't.
He does want to do this, though. Ever since she first gave herself away, he's wanted to know. So with a quiet exhale, he looks back at her and nods.]
[ If this were to take place outside of her crystal, she would need to step away from him. Breaking the seal to reveal Mythra would result in a burst of energy, but here, no precautions need to be taken.
However, Pyra does slip her hands out of his, giving him another smile as her crystal begins to shine.
In a brilliant wash of light, her form vanishes from sight, body and smile and all save for the crystal hovering at the height of where she had been seated. A silhouette of energy takes the shadow of her place as the tall grass around them ripples. The impulse of excess power sweeps through the realm, far harsher and brighter than the softness of Pyra's fire, purer in its form, but as harmless and intangible the sun's light upon the earth.
A figure forms, taking on a more defined shape: feminine, slender, and wearing white. Hair forms out of tendrils of light to crown her head, solidifying weightlessly about the figure's shoulders, collapsing with gravity as the last of the new being takes form. ]
And he wouldn't know it, but it's the kindest smile she's ever worn in all of her years. It helps, not being awakened prematurely. It also helps that she wants to meet him, to be here. ]
[Noctis squints at the light until it fades, finding it bright and familiar, near blinding but too beautiful to look away from, so rather than closing his eyes he shields them just enough that he can watch the change take place. The light reforms, and he holds his breath as it does, uncertain of what to expect but feeling anticipation alongside his lingering nerves. All this time, months of wondering and waiting as patiently as he could, and here she is, at last.
She's beautiful. He can see Pyra in her immediately, the curve of her face and the matching colour scheme, gold and blonde instead of red, but the features are different and distinct enough that he could tell them apart. The smile, too, is different, but kind, and one that makes it easy to smile back, albeit tentative and surprised.]
[ The smile remains, although he might be able to spot a veil of theatrical confidence there, as if she's trying to make an impression. The way she brings her hand up to brush a lock of golden hair over her shoulder is practically haughty. The strands fall weightlessly over her back.
Her eyes open to reveal gold instead of crimson, and she looks back at him. ]
[Is that all, she says. As if he couldn't ask her a million questions on the spot. Is she like Pyra, just as likely to answer a question with another, or deflect effortlessly? Her vibe is cool and confident already, the contrast only serving to intrigue him more.]
You've got me at kind of a disadvantage, y'know. You must know all about me, but I don't know anything about you.
I'm offended. Aren't I your girlfriend too? You should know my favorite color by now.
[ He doesn't even know Pyra's favorite color... Not that Pyra knows his either. Which, she knows that neither do. Hence, the offense is completely in jest. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Feeling is one thing. But wanting... the words she struggles with, every time...]
Are there things you're not... allowed to want for yourself?
[He doesn't know the rules, but he can understand the limitations. There are plenty of things he might want but aren't allowed to pursue, back home. Growing up, normal things like going to university, studying and finding a career, exploring outside the city, living a life away from the public eye- all of it was out of his reach since the day he was born. Her limits seem so self-imposed, but maybe they're not? This place, her existence, is otherworldly.
She'd asked if they were allowed to be together, on his part. What about hers? He trusts her- wants to trust her- she's not just pushing herself to mend the world they're on, right?]
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Her expression falls from him, conflicted. ]
I'm not supposed to have this form you see now... to be Mythra or Pyra.
To be anything other than a crystal. To want... Mm. To feel in general.
[ Observing. That had been all she was meant to do. To watch, to record, and to obliterate when the time came. But is that the truth, either? There's something missing, she feels but-- again, not important.
Yes. She isn't supposed to even feel. Despite this, she brings a hand up to her chest as if she's holding something precious, her look sentimental, albeit struggling still. ] But here we are... And I cannot deny these feelings.
[ Saying what she wants still feels like too much. ]
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His reasons for doing this, for choosing her, are inherently selfish. He knows this, and it's something he's allowed himself after months of doing whatever everyone else told him to do- because he couldn't deny his feelings, either. He can't fault her for thinking of others first as long as the rest still rings true.]
You want me to meet Mythra, [is his response, finally. If she can't say it, he'll say it for her.] You want to use your fire. You want to be with people you care about. ...You... want to be with me.
[He looks meaningfully over at her, more of the tension bleeding from his shoulders, and offers his hand out.]
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As it were, she wants a lot of things. She wants others to be safe, she wants this world to be saved, she wants his world to know the light, she wants her world to last-- and by the Architect, she wants him to live. She wants to live, too. She wants them to stay together, to have what they have and continue to have it for as long as either of them want it....
One want duels with the other: her existing and the world remaining. She cannot have both, and she has chosen the latter. But she can have this, can't she be stronger for him, to say it? She wants to be stronger for him. Inspiring, brave, she can call him all those things, but she needs to finally be brave, act on that inspiration.
Her vision mists, and she bows her head, drawing a breath. She tears not for sorrow for herself, but this time in gratefulness. How lucky is she, to have someone as understanding as him next to her....
Her hand reaches of his, finding it without looking, and she closes her eyes. ]
Yes.
All of that.... yes.
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After the moment passes he gently tugs her hand and pulls her closer, and if she doesn't resist he releases her hand so he can wrap his arms around her instead, holding her against him, that same hand lifting to stroke through her hair. This feels real, too. Not just physically, but he can feel the warmth spreading through him, joy and relief and something softer, fluttering and familiar and yet unnamed. He finds himself smiling, his head resting against hers.]
...If I hug you in a dream, can you feel it in real life?
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He'll feel her head shaking against his shoulder, a soft laugh carried in her voice. ]
No, no... But I do have your head resting in my lap, in reality.
You're very cute when you sleep, you know.
[ Teasing aside, however... she pulls away just enough to look at him. ] Thank you, Noct. For listening.
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Thank you for sharing it.
[For sharing this- this place, this other side of her that he can only imagine few have been lucky enough to experience. For giving him an answer, letting him help her push through to it. Her willingness to try means a lot to him.]
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...So.
[ Her fingers twitch in his. ]
Are you ready to meet Mythra?
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He does want to do this, though. Ever since she first gave herself away, he's wanted to know. So with a quiet exhale, he looks back at her and nods.]
Ready as I'll ever be.
[Bring it on.]
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However, Pyra does slip her hands out of his, giving him another smile as her crystal begins to shine.
In a brilliant wash of light, her form vanishes from sight, body and smile and all save for the crystal hovering at the height of where she had been seated. A silhouette of energy takes the shadow of her place as the tall grass around them ripples. The impulse of excess power sweeps through the realm, far harsher and brighter than the softness of Pyra's fire, purer in its form, but as harmless and intangible the sun's light upon the earth.
A figure forms, taking on a more defined shape: feminine, slender, and wearing white. Hair forms out of tendrils of light to crown her head, solidifying weightlessly about the figure's shoulders, collapsing with gravity as the last of the new being takes form. ]
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....Hey.
[ She's smiling.
And he wouldn't know it, but it's the kindest smile she's ever worn in all of her years. It helps, not being awakened prematurely. It also helps that she wants to meet him, to be here. ]
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She's beautiful. He can see Pyra in her immediately, the curve of her face and the matching colour scheme, gold and blonde instead of red, but the features are different and distinct enough that he could tell them apart. The smile, too, is different, but kind, and one that makes it easy to smile back, albeit tentative and surprised.]
Hey. So you're Mythra?
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[ The smile remains, although he might be able to spot a veil of theatrical confidence there, as if she's trying to make an impression. The way she brings her hand up to brush a lock of golden hair over her shoulder is practically haughty. The strands fall weightlessly over her back.
Her eyes open to reveal gold instead of crimson, and she looks back at him. ]
Well? Is that all you have to say?
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You've got me at kind of a disadvantage, y'know. You must know all about me, but I don't know anything about you.
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I'm offended. Aren't I your girlfriend too? You should know my favorite color by now.
[ He doesn't even know Pyra's favorite color... Not that Pyra knows his either. Which, she knows that neither do. Hence, the offense is completely in jest. ]
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Are you? I thought this was a first meeting, but is it actually a date?
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Okay then... what's your favourite colour?
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[ Which wasn't a thing until they had fallen for... well, Somnus first. But Noctis as well. ]
Yours?
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[He lifts a hand to idly scratch at his cheek. He hadn't expected the same answer.]
It... used to be blue? Not totally sure anymore. Feels kinda cliche.
[The colour of his magic hasn't exactly brought him nothing but joy like it used to, so things are complicated.]
Okay- favourite dessert? I remember you like cake.
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--You want me to choose just one?
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If you feel that strongly about it, make a list.
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To really think.
To concentrate, her nose scrunching, eyes closed, and...! ]
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[ Her head snaps back up to look at him. ] You ready? You better not forget this list.
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